Review Of The 2nd Morecambe Poetry Festival 22nd To 24th September 2023 Part 2

Saturday  23rd September 2023No general walkabout today as the poetry activity was to start at 10 am, with a … walkabout event. The Word Walk, organized by The Big Shed Collective, was an informal gentle walk along the Flock Of Words trail, a footpath designed by artist Gordon Russ Coleman in 2003, stretching from the Prom, near The Station Pub’s Platform bar extension to what is laughably called Morecambe Bus Station even though it consists of a solitary bus shelter hut.  

The Flock Of Words Fanzine

The path is decorated in literary quotations relating to birds,  including  lines by festival guest, Roger McGough, and such worthies as Edward Lear, the Magpie verse, and even the Book Of Genesis extract in which Noah releases a Dove from the Ark.

The start of The Flock Of Words Trail

Poets on the walk were encouraged to fill provided notebooks with lines of verse we were inspired to pen by what we saw and our notes were to be transformed into a unique limited edition fanzine for sharing exclusively with the festival attendees. Despite the rain this was a great event.  Everyone was in fine spirit and members of the public took great interest, in one case even telling us of her own poetry writing.

Gerry Potter, Jackie Hagen and headliner, Roger McGough, (the latter then interviewed by Henry Normal.  More cabaret poetry followed at Johnnies as did another round of They Shoot Poets Don’t They, this time running for almost two hours, and my chance to read several of my poems (though overall I only read out twelve over the weekend as opposed to 22 the previous year).  I also got to read a poem at an open mic set organized by Brian Griffin, and my poem, Ode To John Cooper Clarke, was recorded for use in a radio show too. Cheers to Brian for that.

Ceiling – Winter Gardens

As the night went on, my health was taking a turn for the worse.  I was not drinking much as neither Johnnies or The Winter Gardens provided real ales (Morecambe itself has few decent real ale bars at present).  My stomach and stoma were beginning to turn over and I started worrying I might even end up throwing up, and did so just after getting back to my hotel, and for the night at least I felt better but that would change the next day.

Sunday  24th September 2023 Health Crisis

The final day started reasonably well for me though I barely touched the lovely guest house breakfast I had cheerfully polished off on the previous days. 

My stoma usually needs changing anything from once to three times a day.  AS it was coming off very soon after its morning change I took the bulk of my spares out with me. It was fortunate that I did, and ultimately still not enough.

The Festival Programme

The morning Symposium, in which we informally discussed our views on the current state of publishing and performance poetry opportunity, support and promotion was terrific.

My views;  Much of my performance is not on the established poetry scene but at general open mic pub and club events, where I am well received as a poet among the musicians and reach an audience not expecting poetry but invariably receive it well.  Much of my poetry is written for performing rather than the page. Commercially I do better with my short stories and non-fiction, especially my pub sign histories. 

On publishing, many mainstream publishers are not too geared up to promoting new poets), many poets self-publish and sell books at their readings. The public is still badly affected by how badly poetry appreciation is taught in schools.  Also, with a poetry collection of up to 30 poems costing the same as a 1,000 plus page novel, many will buy the novel as they get more to read from that.

The symposium was followed by a real treat, as festival organizer extra-ordinaire Matt Panesh provided a huge rolling buffet full Sunday lunch, but as my stoma changes were already engaging I had to skip this and watch everyone around me tucking in.

Several times, I had to slip away to the loos to change my stoma bags and by teatime, I had not just changed bags three times but 9. I had only one left, plus the two in reserve at the Sanderling. With great sadness I withdrew from the event and slipped away with a whole evening of activity still to go, including a set by former Poet Laureate Carol Anne Duffy (who I have seen before).  I did get my copy of the Flock Of Words Booklet just as I was leaving which was delightful.

Morecambe Bay

Back at the guest house feeling deeply depressed, I packed and retired to bed by 8pm.

Monday  25th September 2023 Home And Beyond

Again, I went easy on breakfast, only having any at all with needing the energy for my three bus homeward trip which went calmly enough. My stoma relaxed until I got home, where I fortunately had more bags to utilize. 

Tuesday morning I rang my GP, who told me to ring my stoma nurse who told me to re-ring my GP.  I called 111 who contacted my GP who agreed to see me and recommended I blast my stoma clean with a powerful prescribed laxative. I decided to save tis until after performing at The Ferret where I was asked at the last minute as another performer had let them down.  I figured as my stoma was relaxing (having largely starved it for 48 hours, I’d be fine, but it started firing up again and I had to slip away several times to change it. Apologies to Pete The Temp who had also been on in Morecambe.

Back home, I tried the laxative treatment which was decidedly messy.  A week later things were still uncomfortable and the sore throat that had been a factor from the start was now so intense I was struggling to breath so again I called my doctor, stoma team and 111, who put a specialist nurse onto me who recommended I go to the local A & E.  After 7 hours there I was seen and told, ‘It’s just a stomach infection. Go home and ride it out. Just take Strepsils and cough syrup for your throat. Bye Bye.

It is easing up now, at least the stoma is, but hardly feeling fully restored yet.  

Festival Thanks

Huge thanks to Matt Panesh, Maya Ozolina, Brian Bilston, all the performers and open mic’ers,  the staff of The Sanderling Hotel, The Winter Gardens volunteers, Johnnies staff and the various bars and eateries visited, etc.  

RIP – I learned soon after the event of the death (peacefully in his sleep) of poet Paul Blackburn, who had been in the Friday evening audience, though I never saw him there, and who was always supportive of my own work and a lovely chap to know.  He will be missed by all who ever met him.

All photos taken by me.

Arthur Chappell

Review Of The 2nd Morecambe Poetry Festival 22nd To 24th September 2023 Part One

Pre-Travel

After the amazingly good time I had at the 2022 Poetry Festival in Morecambe I signed up for the 2023 event as soon as the tickets went live and also booked in to The Sanderling Guest House as it was such a perfectly located place to get to and from the events from, being just a ten minute walk away from the main venues, The Winter Gardens and Johnnie’s Bar.

Morecambe Poetry Festival Event Admission Badge

My plan was to go a day before the festival and add to my already existing pub sign photo collection. I have a book out on this subject and a second one close to completion. I had only a few signs to still capture in Morecambe and Lancaster and planned to spring out from there to capture signs in other areas of Lancashire and Cumbria.

Sanderling Guest House, Morecambe

Weeks before the festival, disaster struck when my external hard drive containing thousands of my pub signs from over the UK, frazzled out. Several lovely people offered to help retrieve my data but couldn’t access it.  A third of my work, including Morecambe, Lancaster, Birmingham and London signs, seem gone forever.

I now had to recapture most of my Morecambe and Lancaster images from scratch.  

I packed, sorted out dozens of poems for possible readings and worked out a detailed pre-festival itinerary and prepared for my adventure.

The Day Before – Thursday 21st September 2023

              With Lancashire buses going for a bargain £2 a trip, I got to Lancaster on a relaxed two bus journey for just £4. Soon after arriving I found one of my shoes was splitting open so I popped in a city centre shoe shop and bought some new ones that seemed initially comfortable. I dumped my old pair in the nearest bin, put the new ones on and  but as the day went on they started to crunch my toes in painfully. 

I called in a few Lancaster bars, notably Ye Olde John Of Gaunt.   From Lancaster I got a bus over to Carnforth, the only completely fresh area I was to cover over the weekend as I really enjoy the old David Lean weepie, from 1945  Brief Encounter, largely filmed on Carnforth Station, especially in its tea rooms, which are wonderfully preserved as a museum as well as still serving the station.   

As it would be over an hour to the next bus from Carnforth to Morecambe I got the train to the seaside town, and still dragging my suitcase round on castors I took more photos up to 3pm when I could check in to The Sanderling. 

Check in went smoothly and I was soon out again chasing more photos of the lovely town, its street art and especially its pubs.  I got drinks in The Midland Hotel, where Laurence Olivier filmed The Entertainer, The Masons (which has some lovely rum characters to chat to), and Embargo, one I visited last year and where astonishingly, the barman remembered me from thar visit.   I rounded off the night with a curry in a Thai restaurant, Thai Black. 

Ye Olde John O’Gaunt pub sign, Lancaster

The pain from my new shoes was getting so intolerable I took them off and walked back to my guest house in my socks. I went to bed about midnight.

Friday 22nd September 2023

I got my first full English breakfast at The Sanderling on the Friday morning, and headed out to catch the last handful of Morecambe pub signs on my list (I use Pubs Galore listings as a checklist on visiting any area). I then headed into Lancaster again to get more signs there. I also bought more new shoes, this time in a charity shop and these were comfy enough.  (I still have the toe crushers too).  The weather went pants so I called in a randomly picked pub, The Royal Hotel, which was great and all the more so when on chatting to the barman about writing books on pub signs I got him intrigued enough to buy a copy of one of them off me, my only direct sale of the weekend.

My book, Watch The Signs! Watch The Signs!

I got back to Morecambe about an hour before the festival launch and found many were already in Johnnies so I headed in. I found these were not so much early attendees but volunteers helping prepare stuff for the opening and just as I was about to slip away to return later I found myself helping fold hundreds of programme flyers and got my attendance badge which showed I had paid to be involved in the whole show.

I also got a copy of the festival poetry anthology which I happen to have a set of Haiku in.

The Morecambe Poetry Festival Anthology Volume One

And what a show it was, from Matt Panesh’s opening welcome through a stunning talk on the history of spoken word poetry around the World presented by Pete The Temp, to readings by Atilla The Stockbroker and at the magnificent Winter Gardens there were sets by Brian Bilson and Henry Normal.

A late highlight was the jaw dropping comedy and verse set by Thick Richard, accompanied by a state of the art robot (not really just another poet dressed as one, honest). 

Morecambe Bay

This was followed by the first of the weekend’s They Shoot Poets Don’t They poetry round robins, with a generous cas prize for the poet performing when the bar called time.  I won twice in 2022 though other poets won this year.  It was still a great reading opportunity and my contributions were well received by the audience.

Night over, I returned to The Sanderling about 2.30 am.

Links

My Brief Encounter Review https://www.mylot.com/post/3570693/film-review-brief-encounter 

Brief Encounter – The full film on Youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LguRis_h1qc 

All photos taken by me.

Arthur Chappell

Beers Enjoyed In September 2023

Number of new ales x12

Atlantic Pale Ale – 4/2%  *** Pleasant enough keg ale on draught, golden and a little over fizzy heavily citrussed but quaffable. Keg – The Midland Hotel Rotunda Bar, Morecambe.

Midland Hotel, Morecambe, Lancaster

Bowland Brewery – Pheasant Plucker 3.7%  ***** confident that I have had this before but strangely overlooked it for reviews until now.  A dry tasting copper colored session ale with a nice risp edge to it – a classic session ale.    Real ale, Vinyl Tap, Preston

Butcome Brewery – Haka 4.5% ***** A crisp golden mildly citrusy ale, thirst quenching and welcome after a long journey.  Real ale, Ye Olde John O’Gaunt – Lancaster

Cloudwater – Centennial In Your Heart 4.4% *** Hazy, golden citrusy ale with New Zealand hops and traces of orange peel among other fruits.  Not bad but not outstanding either.  Real ale, The Masons – Morecambe

Escape Brewery – If The Caravan’s A Rockin’ 3.8% *** Silly names should really only apply to outlandish offbeat ales though and this is quite a traditional one, a golden pale ale that is nice and risp, but quite conservative for such a daft name being added for the sake of it. Real ale, Orchard – Preston City Centre

Horns Brewing – Hopadelic 4.3% **** Multi-hop blends for a quite neat though rather traditional beer finish, and quite malty too with a hint of citrus. Real ale, Vinyl Tap, Preston

Pub sign- Ye Olde John O’Gaunt – Lancaster

Neptune – Pactolus 4% ** Cloudy, lively (they struggled to pour this), over-hopped and  Citra saturated, drinkable but disappointing.  Real ale, Orchard – Preston City Centre

Purple Moose – Madog’s Ale – 3.7% ***** Dark in its purpling, coming over as a bitter that is just short of being a mild,  with more than a hint of berries and a great taste overall. A great deceptively light session ale.  Real ale, Tap End, Ashton, Preston.

Salopian – Oracle – 4% ***** A very pleasant mildly citrussy golden ale, ideal for a late Summer, early Autumn evening. Real ale, Vinyl Tap, Preston

Stonehouse Brewery – Off Grid 4.1% *** Craft beer-real ale hybrid mix of experimentally engineered hops from the US and with fruit injections like blueberry and strawberry. Fun but not outstanding. Real ale, Vinyl Tap, Preston

Beer bottle and glass- Tiger Beer

Target – Golden Ale 3.9% ***** A light session ale can be as pleasing as any dark stronger brew and this golden gem is a nice relaxing proof of that. Lovely traditional ale. Real Ale – Embargo, Morecambe

Tiny Rebel – Very Cherry Stout 4.5% ***** Unusual but well blended combination, with the cherry add-ins really enhancing the stout giving a sense of a richer stronger ale than the sessioner it actually is. Nice cask/craft cross-over experiment. Real ale, Hopwoods, Preston. 

Beers Enjoyed before but supped again this month.

Beavertown Neck Oil

Lancaster Red

Tiger Beer

Less enjoyed repeat ale – John Smith’s Bitter

All photos taken by me.

Arthur Chappell

Beer, ale, pubs, review, Preston, Morecambe, Lancaster,

Beers Enjoyed In September 2022

Beers Enjoyed In September 2022 x12

A quiet month as far as new ales were concerned as I got two cases of Eagle ales (Bombardier and Banana Bread) as presents, and very welcome they are though I have had and reviewed both elsewhere.  I didn’t get round to a new beer until the 13th day of the month.

Beer

Allanales – Wagtail – 3.8% *** Copper coloured with a dry crispy bitterness, and decent aftertaste but unexceptional.  Real Ale – Stonewell Tap – Lancaster 

Green Duck – Outlaw – 4.2% ***** An American IPA Pale Ale, great beer to start a session off with, golden, crisp, traditional thirst quencher.  Real Ale, Bar Fringe, Manchester.  

Lakes – Pale Ale – 3.5% ***** Lightest of the light in session ale strength, a pale ale unimaginatively just called Pale Ale, but it holds its own with other pales with a pleasing floral bouquet, and a citrusy touch too.  Real Ale – The Bobbin, Lancaster 

Beer

Lancaster – Cascade – 4.2% **** Light ale blending hops and barley to a decent mix, dry, satisfying time passer.  Real Ale – Tap Ends – Ashton, Preston. 

Mighty Medicine Brewing Co – Madchester Cream 4.2% *** Not very creamy, and in fact, not remotely creamy. This is a traditional bitter, possibly running its marketing close to the old Boddington’s slogan ‘ The Cream Of Manchester’.  Hoppy, perfectly passable golden ale but not a classic.  Real ale – The Medicine Tap – Rochdale. 

Neepsend – Verdunia – 4.3% **** Fine copper coloured dry hoppy session ale with a terrific aftertaste. Real Ale – Black Horse, Preston. 

Beer

Old School Brewery (OSB) – Blackboard 3.7% ***** Great to find a bar selling mild and after discovering it in one bar, finding it offered again in another one later in the day was pretty cool. It’s a traditional mild, with a hint of biscuit, a combination that carries very well. Real Ale – Embargo, Morecambe, and Winter Gardens, Morecambe 

Old School Brewery (OSB) – Detention – 4.1% **** Pleasing if inconsequential light session ale. Real Ale – Winter Gardens, Morecambe 

Pennine Ales Hog Man’s Snout – 4.4% ***** Nice pun on stout and a great snout it is, with a hint of cranberry and spices added and not quite dark enough to stop a hint of light shining through the glass.  Real Ale – The Merchant 1686, Lancaster 

Reedley – Pendleside -4%  ***** Delicious golden cutrussy ale, mildly spiced, very hoppy, and bordering on dry.  Real Ale – Smuggler’s Den, Morecambe 

Seven Brothers – Zesty 4.2% ***** Light, pale refreshing blonde pale ale, living up to its name with a distinctive zesty zing.  Real Ale – The Bobbin, Lancaster 

Beer

Stonehenge – Heel Stone – 4.3% ***** A no nonsense bitter with a modest hint of blackcurrant.  Real Ale, Bar Fringe, Manchester.

Photos taken by me  

Arthur Chappell

Days 4 And 5   – The Morecambe Poetry Festival – Sunday !8th September 2022

The festival ran for three days, but I am sandwiching it in between the days either side of the shows too. With nothing going on poetry wise before 2pm, I had breakfast and took a trip out by bus to Heysham, near the old Middleton Towers Pontins camp I had been taken to by my parents through much of my childhood. It is now a housing and trading estate. 

On route I saw (through the bus windows) a strange charity event going on. Several people, many children, were having a fight involving throwing bright coloured paint powders at one another similar to those used in Hindi Holi festivals. It looked great fun. Hope they raised some money for their causes.

Charity powder paint fight – Morecambe

Heysham itself is a quaint little village with just a few bars and a very Gothic crumbling church yard that featured six graves believed to be a very early Christian burial site, which feature on a Black Sabbath album cover.  The graves seem to slope down right to the edge of the sea and possibly into the incoming tide. 

Heysham Graves

I returned to Morecambe, and headed to Johnny’s (there were no more shows at the Winter Gardens now). The opening Poet’s Brunch was a chilled out chance to just chat with other writers and if desired, get some food in, (I skipped on that as the breakfast was enough to keep me going for a few hours to come). 

An open mic session followed, run by Opening Title’s Big Charlie. This was my last direct opportunity to perform my own work of the awesome weekend and it was well received, and there would be a surprising twist later. 

A set by another poet I have met in Manchester next, Dave Viney, a dramatist and a performer at Dominic Berry & Steve O’Connors Freed Up events which I also participated in. 

Big Charlie, who had MC’d the open Mic earlier now got to do his own brilliant set, humorous and poignant in equal measure.  

I got one of the pizzas now, and it was excellent.  No idea why Johnny’s don’t make more of the fact that they have pizza on offer than they do. 

The Pizza Menu at Johnny’s – Morecambe

Kate Fox (the poet, not the social anthropologist) was next, with a very funny and shamelessly Yorkshire slant on life.  Kate has appeared at many events and on numerous platforms, with recurring appearances on Radio Four and she is the poetry voice of the Great North Run.  She has performed Glastonbury too. 

Attila The Stockbroker is a giant of the music and poetry scene, having emerged in the post-punk early 80’s as a powerful and funny voice of radicalism. Funny, shamelessly and brutally honest, no one tells it like it is like Atilla.   His bands, Barnstormer and Barnstormer 1649 (setting songs from the Civil War period to punk music of today) are outstanding too. 

Atilla The Stockbroker’s Book Cover

I have seen Atilla at Wigan Diggers a few times, and at one of the last shows ever performed at Preston’s Ham  & Jam (a favourite venue for me in my current home city). His closing poem-song of the Morecambe set was a passionate plea to men to get themselves checked over for possible signs of bladder & testicular cancer. As I mentioned to him when getting one of his books after his set, I fully support the stance he has on that from my personal struggle with bowel cancer.  Atilla is literally a poet who could save your life. 

With sets by Ste The Poet and Rich Davenport following,(sorry I didn’t keep notes on your stuff guys, but you were great too) it was on to the last bard of the night.  Matt Panesh, performing as Monkey Poet had planned on going on earlier in the day but moved to the later slot as events were running over schedule and he was happier to risk running out of time than have other poets do so. 

It was here that an unexpected turn of events put me centre stage without leaving my seat. Matt  got onto the topic of ‘found poetry’,  and declared excitedly that he had found a poem he assumed to have been left out unsigned by Henry Normal from the previous day.  Matt said the found poem was called ‘S O P’  though he wasn’t sure what it stood for. I did, it stood for Standard Operational Procedure, used in business to make sure all staff perform their duties the same way for time and motion purposes. I knew because I had written a poem called S O P myself, which I even had copies of in my bundles for possible performing at the festival (though I hadn’t got round to it at that point.  As Matt launched into Henry Normal’s S O P it dawned on me that it was in fact my S O P poem Matt had ended up finding, as it had most likely been dropped by me accidentally while in the previous night’s open mic competitive They Shoot Poets Don’t They event.  As Matt finished the poem I interrupted him as politely as I could to tell him it wasn’t Henry’s but mine, which we both thought was hilarious.  I have added the poem here, (the link is below) and it is a huge honour and ego massage to be mistaken for a performer of Henry Normal’s calibre. Whether Henry feels similar remains to be seen. 

Anonymous Found Poem – On display in The Embargo Bar, Morecambe

Matt’s set was outstanding in itself, but the audience was doubly appreciative in full conscious awareness that Matt had made the magic happen for all of us all weekend. We gave him a thoroughly deserved standing ovation as he wrapped up. 

A closing informal open mic had been timetabled. I had a few poems ready for it, but I felt it was much more apt that the high note things ended on with and for Matt was too perfect as the closing moment of the whole extraordinary shebang. No 2am finish this time. Johnny’s Bar would be closing at midnight, (perhaps more so for being on the brink of the Queen’s funeral the following morning). This was a time to share a final drink with friends old and new.  It was hard tearing myself away at the end to head to my guest house digs for the last time. 

Cheers everyone!

19th September – Departure Day 

Monday was relatively unexceptional. Breakfastic, final packing, check out and bus rides home.  With the bank holiday thrown for the State Funeral of Elizabeth II the direct Morecambe to Preston service was discontinued so I had to change buses in Lancaster. I was home at 1pm. 

In Gratitude

So many to thank, and I don’t doubt I have missed many. The people of Morecambe, Lancaster and Heysham in general. The staff of the Sanderling Guest House were magnificent. The staff of both The Winter Gardens and Johnny’s were great as well. (On the Sunday going to  the bar at Johnny’s I was greeted with ‘the usual’ and a knowing point at the pump I was ordering from.  I’d become a regular in just three days of patronage.   The many poets I met, and those with whom this was a wonderful reunion. The audiences, who showed appreciation way above the call of duty throughout – you made this a very special weekend.  Finally, Monkey Man himself, Matt Panesh initiated the event, and kept it on course in turbulent times that derailed several great activities and events. Attila had declared the line up the best he had appeared in over a forty year career. He was not wrong. This wasn’t a poetry show – it was the Woodstock of poetry shows.  I’m sure I am not alone in thinking I was part of something massive and fantastic.  That the 2023 show seems certain to run, I aim already to go along, as me, as Henry Normal, or anyone.  This was beyond incredible, and without Matt at the helm, it would never have happened, and Morecambe was just the perfect place for everything.  

Links   

My poem, S O P – the text as read by Matt Panesh (Monkey Man). https://arthurchappell.wordpress.com/2022/09/20/__trashed/ 

Album Cover for The Best Of Black Sabbath, featuring the Heysham Graves https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Best_of_Black_Sabbath#/media/File:Best_of_BS.jpg 

Youtube – Dave Viney – Pixel Perfect https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n2RyiDyoDFU 

Big Charlie – Only I Can Save Mankind (this was performed during his Morecambe set too https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vel0PKw68BA 

Kate Fox – True Grit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3nJYZHlYvoA 

Youtube – Attila The Stockbroker – Attila The Stockbroker – Russians in the DHSS/Asylum Seeking Daleks/Cleans up the City https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gYzDOmDxUuI 

Youtube – Monkey Poet –  ‘Hors d’Oeuvres’ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vaWs7_8MWyk 

Arthur Chappell

Day 3 -The Morecambe Poetry Festival – Saturday !7th September 2022

Having seen their scooters on the Friday evening, I now met some of the Lambretta scooter riders as several of them were booked into the Sanderling Guesthouse and came down to breakfast.  A few of them were thrilled to have met John Cooper Clarke wandering down the prom, and that he had been only too happy to pose for selfies with them. They had no idea why he was in Morecambe until I was able to tell  them he was a headliner in the poetry festival. 

Lambrettas – Morecambe Promenade

Events starting from Noon meant less wide travel, but I had a little shopping to do.  As my suitcase was disintegrating I popped over to a nearby market to get a new one, returning to The Sanderling to drop it off in my room. 

Festival Market Hall – Morecambe

I went out again, wandering around, and found a nice car boot sale going on, where I bought a neat line drawing of a pub sign that one trader was selling.  It was actually a licensed restaurant promo for The Rusty Pig, in Ottery Saint Mary, Devon, which plays a part in the annual burning tar barrel race on or near to November 5th every year. 

Rusty Pig Poster Art

Johnny’s was open at noon, so I headed there, drinking Pepsi for most of the afternoon, saving my liver abuse for the evening.  The show started at 1pm with a group of poets from Manchester called Switchblade Society.  They came over to me just before they went on and let me know that as one of the group had been unable to attend the event and invited me to join in as a substitute so I had a five-seven minute slot to present my own work, a more continuous performance than I had at the last poet standing event the night before.  It seemed apt that I was from Manchester originally it was an honour to be briefly an honorary Switchblade Society Bard, among some great voices. Cheers for the opportunity folks. I got help with one poem from a toy Clanger as they are referenced in the poem. 

Entrance to Johnny’s – Morecambe

I was really struggling with the bannister free stage steps up to the stage at Johnny’s.  My stoma condition makes me a bit rickety on steep steps.  I’d actually made it up them the night before after several beers. Now drinking Pepsi I ended up crawling onto the stage on my hands and knees. I started by declaring that I was my own stunt man. 

The Clanger

The Saturday afternoon sets were child friendly, and though I rarely consciously write for family suitable readers and listeners quite a lot of my stuff is suitable for younger listeners, though my saturation pop culture references might baffle some younger listeners.  I certainly have some stuff for those seeking more mature content too. 

My set enabled me introduce the poem I’d been in the middle of when time was called the previous night, enabling the listeners to hear the full version. I also got to plug my pub signs book, Watch The Signs!  Watch The Signs!  The book contains a poem (Ben Brierley) which mentions pub signage). 

The Switchblade show was followed by a fabulous generation gap busting set by Joy France & Skully, a retired lady and wild-child streetwise youngsta combining forces in a fascinating chalk and cheese counter-balance.  Skully looks an archetypal punk kid though the real cheeky irreverent stuff was coming from Joy. 

The next performer was an old friend from Manchester, Dominic Berry, who often appeared in shows I took part in and along with Steve O’Commer, co-ran monthly Freed Up open mic poetry events at Manchester’s Green Room Theatre up to its closure. I even got to co-host the show with Dominic one night in Steve’s absence too.  

Dominic was on twice in Saturday’s shows in the Morecambe Festival, once with a family friendly set and later with his more adult suited stuff.  He was on form with both. His children’s set, with only a few kids in the audience,  was actually a story about a dragon who hates poets and poetry until a brave poet teaches it poetry and saves the land. It was huge fun, the poetic equivalent of a Punch & Judy show, with Dominic’s wild energy capturing the flight of the dragon and plight of the poet-knight beautifully.  A true tour-de-force. 

Winter Gardens Interior

The first visit of the day to the main stage at the Winter Gardens then, for John Hegley, presenting another family friendly show, with verse and stories based on his drawings. After showing examples of his father’s impressive Impressionist artwork, John tells how the artistic talent has rubbed on himself before showing off quite intentionally simple line drawings, including a picture of a dog with a camel style hump.  

Back to Johnny’s for a trio of poetry  sets there (including Dominic Berry’s reprise set).

The Winter Gardens was then the location for the Saturday headliners, Lemn Sissay and Henry Normal, who have been travelling as a pair on the circuit for a while now.  

Lemn was a member of Manchester Commonword, who hosted one of the first writing groups I was involved with on the mid 1980’s though I only wrote prose in my early years,  and it was great to see Lemn’s career go through the stratosphere, quite deservedly. He has one of the greatest and most lyrical poetic voices of any performer.  He has gained himself an OBE, chancellorship of Manchester University, had poems embossed into the very brickwork and paving of Manchester, published his autobiography, and appeared on TV in shows ranging from Winter Walks to Celebrity Mastermind, and Have I Got News From You.  You only need to see Lemn on stage for five minutes to see his accolades are thoroughly deserved.  

His set in Morecambe combined anecdotes from his remarkable history to poems and some stand up comedy. A neat touch was his interruption phone call from his partner where he apologises for being on the stage in the middle of something. This seems innocuous and light until the unseen and unheard caller redials later to interrupt Henry Normal who carries on the gag, cementing nicely how well the performers have bonded on their tour, 

Henry Normal is a poet I never met personally but who has influenced my life in many ways and who I would be astonishingly mistaken for later in the weekend (not for looking like him, as I bear no physical resemblance to him beyond us both looking humanoid).  

Book cover to Henry Normal’s The Escape Plan

I remember his sitcom Packet Of Three, set in a run down North Manchester theatre, The Crumpsall Palladium (which never existed), with Frank Skinner & Jenny Eclair in support.  Henry went on to co-write The Mrs Merton Show and The Royle Family among much more and develop his own laconic stand up and verse.  I was delighted earlier this year when my 60th birthday presents included a signed copy of Henry’s book The Escape Plan, so seeing him live was another layer to a great cake, with an intriguing twist to come twenty four hours later. 

Henry has a fun habit of scattering his poetry sheets around as he finishes reading them, and when he decides one isn’t going to be read out on the night. He later invites the audience to help themselves to any of the poems scattered round, inm effect securing themselves a free copy of the actual pages the author-performer handled.  I never picked one up and I had no idea that his action would involve me the next night.  

We returned to Johnny’s Bar for a few more great poetry sets before the finale, which was a reprise of the previous night’s Last Poet Standing game, now rebranded They Shoot Poets Don’t They? While the prize for the Friday game had been a bottle of red wine, this time £50 was up for grabs. I felt it was unlikely I’d win again, and saw it simply as a chance to project some of my verse.  

The game went on for ninety minutes this time, having taken less than thirty the night before, but we were all very much up for it, poets and audience alike.  I really should say a few words praising the audience who were great to meet and clearly loved the performances and performers throughout. A few even bought me pints to show their appreciation for my part in keeping them entertained during the the shows, and I am really grateful.  

Though we seemed to have longer to perform between us, the poets shot through material as if the 2am cut off was imminent, and many poems were read quite rapidly. One poet even did a few Haiku one at a time.  I should add my appreciation that becoming aware that I was struggling with the stage steps the mic was brought down to floor level, to save me having to climb the steps multiple times. Really appreciated. 

To my shock, lightning did strike twice and I won the competition again. I actually felt as shaken as elated by my luck.  

I headed back to the Sanderling guest house, accompanied by another of the poets who was staying at the same place, which was much quieter now as the Lambretta Club riders had moved on to Harrogate, the next destination in their UK tour. 

Links 

The Shoreline Of Infinity link for sales of my pub signs book, Watch The Signs! Watch The Signs! https://www.shorelineofinfinity.com/product/watch-the-signs-watch-the-signs/ 

Youtube – Joy France & Skully. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TfUKIwpPUQk

Youtube – Dominic Berry (adult mode) Pub Triolet https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3bTl4qkuaZI 

Youtube – John Hegley https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=chrlgX_29_c 

Youtube – Lemn Sissay – Inspire And Be Inspired https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WzZs1w3NWzg 

Youtube – Henry Normal – Not My Cup Of Tea – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Ln1zmYn_u8 

All photos taken by me – Arthur Chappell 

Day 2 -The Morecambe Poetry Festival – Friday !6th September 2022

With the poetry festival not starting until the evening, I had a whole day of exploring ahead of me. Having seen much of Morecambe the day before, I decided to get a bus back down the line to Lancaster to go round the cathedral and castle city.  Again I gave priority to pub signs, but I also explored the outside of the Castle and the Cathedral. There was a big queue to get in as there were books of condolences there for messages on the late Queen Elizabeth 2nd. 

Lancaster Castle

I called in three of the city’s bars, The Merchant, The Stonewell Tap and the Bobbin. All fine establishments. 

The highlight of the Lancaster trip for me was the double museum, The Judges Lodgings And Museum Of Childhood. 

Dapper looking chap in Lancaster

The Lodgings is a Town House, the oldest in Lancaster, used to house visiting judges involved in cases tried in the courts in the city. The judges who presided over the cases of the Lancashire Witches resided here during the case. 

A lady dressed in period costume acted as a guide, (the museums are entire run by very enthusiastic volunteers). She was playing the role of Wive’s companion, a lady who took care of Judge’s wives while their husbands were on duty. The most impressive attraction is the banqueting hall with a lavish dinner  table surrounded by mirrors, one behind every seat.  This is no mere decorative conceit. The servants, who were all male, were forbidden to make eye contact with the diners while they ate so they would watch the meal being consumed in the mirrors, and only turn round when the food was finished. 

Judge’s Lodging Exhibit – Lancaster

The third floor of the museum serves a separate and truly wonderful role, being literally a museum of childhood delights. It is a collection of toys and games through the ages. Though exhibits go back to Georgian and Victorian toys the central splendour is the toys of the sixties and seventies including Sindy Dolls, Action Men, Corgi Toys, A Captain Scarlet Cloudbase play set, giant cuddly wombles, etc. This is not so much educational as nostalgia overload where your heart pounds seeing toys you had, or got to play with at a friend’s house.  Perhaps the oddest of the older toys is a twelve inch posable action figure of Winston Churchill, complete with cigar in his mouth. 

Lambretta Scooters

I got the bus back to Morecambe where there were also many fabulous scooters around, owned by members of The Lambretta Riders Club Of Great Britain, who were in Morecambe as part of their annual national tour before riding on to Harrogate a few days on. and grabbed a very nice Prawn Thai Curry in The Crown Hotel, before heading in to Johnny’s, which was open though not yet involved in  the poetry festival. It was a chance to see the venue that would be so important to me in the next few days. Then it was off to The Winter Garden for the launch of the poetry festival. 

Winter Gardens Interior

After a brief intro from Matt Panesh, the event organiser,  the first performer was Linton Kwesi Johnson, A legendary radical Jamaican born, London based poet who was actively involved in the Black Panther Movement in his youth and a very vocal opponent of Thatcherism later. 

His poem on the race riots of the 1980’s was incredibly powerful. 

Joelle Taylor followed with an equally potent performance on the theme of defence of butch women’s writes with a superb balance of pride, humour and anger. 

Later came Mike Garry, a poet I know from my many happy years on the Manchester Poetry scene, and who ran some workshops I was fortunate enough to take part in.  He would later do a full set at the Morecambe Festival’s fringe activity site, Johnny’s Bar.  

John Cooper Clarke Book Cover

The real highlight of the night for me, as for many undoubtedly was the set by John Cooper Clarke. Seeing him at a Rock Against Racism event in Manchester in 1978 kick started my own love of poetry.  Though the Buzzcocks were the event headliners, it was JCC who left the most profound impression on me.  Sometimes people hearing my own verse tell me that I remind them of Clarke, which is a compliment I never tire of. 

His set was subjected to an irritating persistent heckler, to which JCC simply turned the mic round so it amplified her voice as if she was the one entertaining us instead of him until she was ejected from the venue to much relief for all, and then he went back to his material anew, including his best known poem Evidently Chicken town (as featured in  the penultimate episode of The Sopranos).  Seeing Clarke again had the same nostalgic vibe for me as seeing the toys of childhood earlier in the day in Lancaster. 

Jonny’s Interior – Morecambe

 Back to Johnny’s now, where my green  wristband (proof of having paid to attend all the festival activities) came into play.  Mike Garry did a full set, blending poetry and stand up, before giving way to Gothically dressed performer Thick Richard, who certainly is not remotely thick, and certainly is very funny. 

The final event of the night was the open mic event labelled ‘Last Poet Standing’.  This was a rapid fire poetry duel for poets to recite a poem each in turn, going round in circles, with the stipulation that whoever was on the mic as the bar called time at 2am exactly, won a prize.  As good as the poems and poets taking part were, it was really the luck of the draw and not skill as to who was on as the timer hit. It happened to be me, and my prize was a bottle of Chilean Red Wine.  It was an exhilarating contest and one a poet could win simply exploit by going on with extra long poems or reading very slowly, but everyone kept their work short, and the turnaround was quick, giving a sense of pass the parcel with poetry rather than music.  A few poets only had a few poems with them, and two members of the audience joined in with work never performed before, one with a very moving tribute to a loved one, already written but unseen before and  the other chap writing his poem on the spot. It was a great end to the night and already a genuine sense of poetry community was forming that helped show how special the festival was and is to all involved, performers and audience alike. 

Hotel, and bed now. 

Links 

Youtube – Joelle Taylor, No Man’s Land (We Belong Here) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qd3SPziQJlw 

Youtube – Mike Garry’s famous poem – God Is A Manc https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L61okbUrdg0&t=63s 

Youtube – Linton Kwesi Johnson – Sonny’s Lettah https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7uvY5qU7ayg 

Youtube – John Cooper Clarke – The Sugar Puffs Ads https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zh0da-suHKc 

John Cooper Clarke –  I Wanna Be Yours https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tg_AEE9sdk0 

All photos taken by me – Arthur Chappell

The Morecambe Poetry Festival – !6th -18th September 2022 Day 1

Thursday 15th September 2022  Prior To Going, Arrival And First Night Adventures. 

An incredible weekend, with some of the greatest spoken word performers Britain has to offer, including, in no particular order, Lemn Sissay, Henry Normal, Thick Richard, Attila The Stockbroker, John Cooper Clark, Linton Kwesi Johnson, John Hegley, Kate Fox, Mike Garry, Dominic Berry and host, Monkey Poet (Matt Panesh) among many others, including many fantastic open mic performers.  My apologies to poets I haven’t mentioned by name here or in the notes to follow. I never saw a bad performance or poem all weekend, which is quite something. 

Sign For The Sanderling Guest House – Morecambe

My reviews cover much of the festival, plus my explorations of Morecambe, Lancaster & Heysham in the days and gaps between stage events. There are also links to reviews of bars and restaurants visited over the weekend. 

Pre-festival there was much going on. I booked some months back, and prepared my trip with near military precision, working out places to visit, stay,  and which poems to take along. I shortlisted thirty four poems to take along, expecting to read out three or four of them in the open mic events. I’d get through twenty-two and another hilariously accidentally got read out by Matt Panesh towards the end of the closing hour of the festival (as you’ll see in that review section). 

I booked into a modestly priced guest house, The Sanderling, close to the main promenade road and only a ten minute walk to the  Winter Gardens and Johnny’s Bar, the two venues at the centre of the festival. 

Though the shows would not start until the Friday evening, I set out to get there on the Thursday to explore the town and expand on my pub sign collection. I have in fact been to Morecambe to get signs before but not for years, and there were many pubs still to find, as well as several that may have changed their signs.  I have a book out on pub signs already with a second commissioned for sure and a third provisionally accepted. I am actually doing better as a pub historian than I am as a poet. 

Book Cover to Watch The Signs! Watch The Signs! my book on pub signs.

A week before I was due to travel to Morecambe, the Queen died.  Many public events were cancelled, including the Wigan Diggers Festival I was going to (just to watch). I was fearful the poetry festival could fall too, especially if the Queen’s funeral date landed over the weekend it was set for, but the event had the all clear so it was all systems go, until two days before my departure. My doctors called me in for blood tests, a routine follow on to my bowel cancer surgery nearly two years back to check the symptoms were not making a comeback. The night before departure I was notified that the tests proved there was a problem and then the phone went dead before I could find out what it was. Only on making several calls and being put on hold a great deal I found out my iron levels and cholesterol are running high, and I needed to retake the blood tests to check them again.  After some frought negotiation I was eventually invited to the doctors the morning I planned to travel which meant I had to get up earlier than planned, go to the doctor and then get home again to collect my luggage. 

Pub Sign – The Station – Moreambe

I finally set off about 10am on the Thursday and had a smooth bus ride from Preston city Centre right to Morecambe. I had three hours to kill before I could check into my rooms, so I hauled my suitcase round on its casters and took photos, as I have done before. I also stopped off at a pub, The Station (the original Morecambe Railway Station) for a quick beer. I entered a hall that would have been the main ticket hall to find myself in the middle of a tea dance, and cut gingerly round the waltzers to the main bar area, narrowly avoiding becoming conscripted by one lady as a potential new dance partner. The bar itself was very nice (I’ll review the pubs and beers consumed separately). 

At the Sanderling Guest House check in was very efficient, though the staff seemed to mistake me for someone else they were expecting too. I was given a double room though I’d booked a single. My room, reception, and the breakfast hall were all on the ground floor which was great. 

In my room I found my walkabout had ripped the base of my canvas suitcase apart. I was lucky my luggage hadn’t fallen out. I decided I had to buy a new suitcase before I went home. 

Eric Morecambe Statue – Morecambe

I headed out to do more exploring and get more photos. As well as pubs, I got shots of the Eric Morecambe Statue, war memorials, the beach & sea and a few less expected sights. A film crew were setting up scenes around the Midland Hotel. I later learned they were filming for Season Four of crime drama The Bay, a Broadchurch style series set in and around Morecambe. I have never watched it, though now I want to. 

The weather was mostly lovely, an autumnal Summer, though the first night a brief howling gale flared up round me from nowhere only to vanish just as instantly ten minutes later. There would be a brief rainfall later in the weekend but I was indoors when that happened. 

Pub – The Smuggler’s Den – Morecambe

After a visit to Morecambe’s Oldest pub, The Smuggler’s Den, I got my evening meal, at a straight forward chippy as there is nowhere better to have traditional good old fashioned fish and chips than the seaside. The service at the Poulton Square chippy was delightful, as were their chips.  It was here that I learned who the film crew were.  A few more pub visits followed and by 10pm I was tired enough to return to my guest house room and have an early night. 

Morecambe is a lovely seaside town that has often suffered from bad fortune and in competing with its near neighbour, Blackpool, with its tower, zoo, Golden Mile and fun fair.  Morecambe had two piers that have now gone (one lost to fire, the other to storm damage).  A disastrous investment in a doomed theme part based on Noel Edmonds’s Crinkly Bottom and Mr Blobby crashed and financially broke the town.  The beach’s reputation for fast tides and quicksands (especially when the deaths of 19 Chinese Cocklepickers at Cockermouh on Morecambe’s extensive Bay in 2004) does the town no favours either. 

The Midland Hotel – Morecambe

An under-rated contributor to the town’s decline was a successful movie filmed there, 1960’s The Entertainer. Hearing that Sir Laurence Olivier was making a film in the town must have seemed very exciting to the town. Alas, the theme of the film was the decline of a once mighty vaudeville star, Archie Rice, drowning in bitterness and resentment at being reduced to playing in end of the pier shows to indifferent audiences, and judging seedy bathing beauty contests.  Locations included The Midland Hotel and the stage of The Winter Gardens (setting for much of the poetry to come). The film was successful, and gave Laurence his greatest performance bar none, with Rice as a superbly monstrous character you still feel sorry for, but it did Morecambe an enormous injustice. 

Today the town is in a renaissance, thanks largely to the success of The Bay, and in hosting many great arts events. Hawkwind played there soon before the very successful poetry event I was privileged to be involved in from the next evening, following sleep, and more adventures. 

Links 

Youtube – Scene From The Entertainer filmed in The Winter Gardens https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xYmD-RKuhi0 

The Sands Of Morecambe Bay song – Christy Moore https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UN8gAlhSMDA 

Arthur Chappell

Poem S O P

Me in performance, taken by Lethal Gem in The Hellfire Club, Manchester

All individuals must now wear standard issue uniforms!

Be sure each and every individual among you conforms.

To the stereotype group we have labelled ‘Individual’.

Help us to make non-conformity a commonplace habitual

Routine, where the goats stop the mindless sheep bleating

And start eating the same offal as all the goats are eating.

We are introducing a brand new standard operational

Procedure to make individualism an occupational

Way of life where every worker stands out from the crowd

So from now on, not being an individual is not allowed.

The goats among you will all agree to this proposition.

Only mindless sheep will support the opposite position.

Oh, what a surprise. We have a resounding majority!

Those who are not individuals are officially the minority.

Arthur Chappell

On 18th September 2022 at The Morecambe Poetry Festival this was accidentally presented by Matt Panesh as a found poem and unwittingly attributed to the great poet, Henry Normal.

Standard Operational Procedure (an SOP) is a genuine business practice where procedures in commerce and assembly are broken down into small micromanaged steps to make sure all staff do the job exactly the same way.